"How are you?" It's a simple question with not such a simple answer.

Today I asked people how they were doing. Some of them couldn't give me any answer. So instead, they just said, "I don't know!"

"How can you not know how yourself is doing? You don't have to be a rocket scientist to be able to answer such a short and simple question!" And so I thought...


A couple of hours ago I was lost in my day dreaming and emotional turbulence (as on any other day). Some people I know saw me and asked how I was doing. I was caught off guard and couldn't answer the question. I smiled, thought for a while, mumbled something incoherent, tried to hide my confusion by smiling again. But that was it. And at last I answered that simple question with the same, "eerrr..., I don't know!"


And then alone, I tried to solve life's newest mystery, which this simple "how are you"-question introduced. I looked at myself in the mirror and asked, "how are you?" My image smiled but I also saw a big blotch of denial on my cheeks, just where the big smile dwelled. I asked again, "Really, dear... Tell me truthfully, how are you?"


"Fine!" The woman in the mirror answered convincingly. But I, the person who knows the woman in the mirror and her cunning very well, I saw this woman sent away a little doubt into the never ending coridors behind her tangled mind.


I realized then, that trying to answer the question while looking in the mirror won't give me any result. So I meditated. Ultimate question asked. Then I waited. one, two, three minutes passed. Rrrrrrriiiiiing!!!!! My cell rang its annoying old telephone ringtone. I picked up the phone. Someone cheerfully said,"Hello, Novy! It's me! How are you?"


"I don't know", I answered.
But at least I was fast this time.

every single time
there are just the same
tears
waitings
disappointments

every single time
there are just the same
misunderstandings
angers
neglects

But love
keeps on giving me
illusions
of hope

And I am his fool
for believing
every single word,
every single time